She was almost completely free of all limitation, and her heart was ready to fly; but it got too hard. Suddenly the clouds were gray, and the situation just became too dense - full of confusion and uncomfortable emotion. Everything she didn't ever want to experience again.
She started with one stone and then discovered she had thrown five. After the first one, it was just too easy. So she didn't stop, knowing the entire time this was not what she was supposed to be doing. She was only backing herself into the same corner she had finally grown brave enough to walk away from.
What was she doing? He wasn't a monster. She was just so scared of everything that had already happened to her. She wanted the confusion and uncomfortable emotion to go away, but she only made it worse.
And she didn't know how to stop.
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